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Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Marko-isms

Marko is getting to that age where he speaks very clearly, but the things that he says are hilarious.  Most of them are just things he's heard us say that he's repeating -- but some of it is his own wackiness.


He's reaching a milestone right now: he is finally beginning to use "I" and "you" correctly.  You know what's more confusing than a boy who says "I" when he means "you" and "you" when he means "I"?  A boy who does so half the time.  I am constantly misunderstanding him.

On to the Marko-isms.

* * *

At church:

Priest: We offer this Mass for the repose of the soul of Edmund Gross.

Marko: Ha ha!  Gross!


* * *

At church, a different Sunday:

I am discreetly nursing the baby -- no cover but it totally looks like I'm just holding him.  I'm patting myself on the back for how subtle I am being when -- 

Marko:  The baby is nursing!  He's having some nurse!  He's having some milk!  He's having a little nurse!


* * *

Misheard lyrics:

Lipstick stains (from Hey Soul Sister) --> fish stick stains

Aux Champs Elysee --> Oh, song can you say

We can work it out --> We can't work at all

Oh, I got a gal and she is a daisy --> Oh, I got a gal and she is a crazy

* * *

Marko: Go to bed, Gilbert!  Did I stutter?

* * *

Marko: Would you like a cookie?

Me: I don't have any cookies.  But I have lots of pumpkin.  How about something made out of pumpkin?

Marko: How about something made out of cookies?

* * *

Me: And if that mockingbird don't sing, Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring.

Marko (upset): That mockingbird DID sing, Mama.

Me:  ... And if that looking glass gets broke, Mama's gonna buy you a billy goat.

Marko: It didn't get broke!  The looking glass didn't get broke!

Me: ... And if that donkey cart falls down ....

Marko: It didn't fall down!  It got up!  The donkey cart got up!

Me: Never mind.

Marko: (pause)  Mama, sing it again.  Tell Michael he gets a mockingbird if he stops crying.

* * *

Yesterday

Me: We're going to water the plants today!

Marko: We're going to fly in a red airplane today?

Me: Um ... no, I don't think we can do that today.

Marko: (howls)

Today

Me: Do you want to go to the library today?

Marko: Yes!  We will fly in a red airplane.

Me:  Uh ... no ... just the library.

Marko: (howls)

Me: Wait.  Do you mean the van airplane?

Marko: Yes!  Ride in the van airplane to the library!

He then goes and happily gets buckled into his "airplane seat" to ride to the library in our beat-up, GMC ... "airplane."

* * *

I know there are lots more but I can never remember them all!  This kid is a riot.  Even right now he is quietly chanting to himself, "Those tasty treats are not good.  Keep them safe and dry.  Roll it up," and other things that apparently have to do with the book he is reading.  When he isn't giving his stream of consciousness, he's singing to himself, with or without words.

Aaaand now he's trying to eat his farm book.  Time to go read to him, I think.  Gotta give this kid stuff to do or he will quite literally destroy everything in the house.

2 comments:

The Sojourner said...

"How about something made out of cookies?" LOL.

My sister is starting to get out of this phase. (She's almost 6.) It's very sad.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing.

One of my favorites was when son 3 (who's a little older than 2.5 now) could walk around and get things for himself, but wasn't speaking clearly yet, because his brother usually spoke for him, on top of him...etc.

He was able to get himself an ice-cube from the freezer. He was unable to understand that they melt. So he was looking for it everywhere and saying "Where is my ice boob? Where's my ice BOOB?!!"

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