tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post114566279201052735..comments2023-10-21T03:54:12.029-04:00Comments on A Gift Universe: Fashion for the tactile-defensive womanSheilahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10853868724554947854noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-86776511835709776172017-05-23T16:05:31.789-04:002017-05-23T16:05:31.789-04:00Wow, those comments did take a long time to show u...Wow, those comments did take a long time to show up!<br /><br />I have never tried the 50s vintage look but now I feel I must. For science.The Sojournerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04559244806125834569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-53558533609823071102017-04-30T23:44:26.178-04:002017-04-30T23:44:26.178-04:00I thought I had replied to Sojourner and that my c...I thought I had replied to Sojourner and that my comment just went into moderation. Did it sneak into the spam folder, perhaps? Cristinahttp://linguavert.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-18101148486527495352017-04-30T07:47:38.422-04:002017-04-30T07:47:38.422-04:00Oooh, a whole fashion conversation got going here ...Oooh, a whole fashion conversation got going here and I didn't notice! I do enjoy this stuff, even if I rarely actually dress up. I had a fashion book as a preteen and had decided I was the "Arty/Offbeat" type. Trouble is, while I LOVE the outfits, I just don't have the chutzpah to pull it off. As I wrote in my most recent post, the way I get by socially is by not taking risks, because I have a lot of fear that I will miscalculate and do it wrong. Because I've done it wrong a lot1<br /><br />These days I do definitely trend toward styles called "natural" or "sporty." Usually I do wear clothes with a waist, but right now I have none (Jackie did a real number on my figure) so it seemed best to pick something that didn't draw attention to my shapelessness. Normally I'm "softened straight" -- I'm not angular, but I'm not very curvy either. I'm petite and small-boned, but when I gain weight is goes to my waist and thighs and makes me shapeless. I should read about all these types and see if they sound good. The trouble, for me, is that a lot of time I love the description but hate the outfits! And, of course, even if I love the outfits that doesn't mean I can find them, especially in my price range and sufficiently comfortable.<br /><br />I do know that I'm a Spring, which is good because I love spring colors. It's a lot easier to find and wear the right colors than the right styles, because even a t-shirt can be aqua, red, or coral.<br /><br />Sojourner, I love that dress!Sheilahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10853868724554947854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-18110495016351844222017-04-28T11:16:09.479-04:002017-04-28T11:16:09.479-04:00You're right that if you need waist definition...You're right that if you need waist definition, you're really not a Natural! <br /><br />I was just discussing the Romantic type with a friend who thinks all the examples of Romantic outfits online are too "frou-frou." We'd both like to see less fussy styles. We also agree that Romantic skirts can be as flowy as Natural ones <i>as long as</i> there is some waist definition. Wider belts preferable to narrow ones. Conversely, tapering skirts look good as well, because they emphasize the waist in another way. <br /><br />Bust definition is very Romantic as well. Which brings me to my next question: How does the 50s vintage look suit you? <br /><br />My friend also just introduced me to McJimsey's categories, which expand on Kibbe's. So more studying for me, for now! Cristinahttp://linguavert.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-21754155181993131602017-04-27T09:20:05.386-04:002017-04-27T09:20:05.386-04:00I wore this dress for Easter and looked so good in...I wore this dress for Easter and looked so good in it I felt quite scandalous.<br /><br />https://www.landsend.com/products/womens-fit-and-flare-dress/id_297664?sku_0=::Z55The Sojournerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04559244806125834569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-60262855158735738412017-04-27T09:15:26.634-04:002017-04-27T09:15:26.634-04:00I don't think I'd look good in that dress ...I don't think I'd look good in that dress at all. :p I look better in things that have a defined waist but that also depends on where the waist hits. Pre-kids I could do natural waist but post-kids empire waist is better. (It makes me look pregnant but so does basically everything. Might as well look like a hot pregnant woman.)<br /><br />When I took an online Kibbe quiz the other night when my toddler had me up in the wee hours I matched most closely with Romantic but I think I'm too big/tall for that to quite fit. <br /><br />I'm 5'7", with big hands and feet, and somewhat pear shaped. (My breasts and arms are still quite large but not compared to my very fine ass. ;) ) I am definitely too curvy to pull off the "boyish" minimalist look but since I'm so large frilly feminine details look ridiculous bordering on drag queenish. Maximum style (and comfort, luckily!) seem to come from a sort of minimalist feminine look.The Sojournerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04559244806125834569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-57376630792568612202017-04-26T10:38:23.476-04:002017-04-26T10:38:23.476-04:00Hi, Sojourner! I'd love to share more! I'd...Hi, Sojourner! I'd love to share more! I'd need more information to help you pinpoint your type, but going with what we already know (and because I've spent a few hours looking up Natural stuff for Sheila!), the following might be helpful . . . <br /><br />In Kibbe's system, a Natural is very "yang" -- but on the blunt rather than the angular end of the scale. If you're a Natural, you're more straight than curvy. <br /><br />A Natural blogger I recently read said that the real test of whether you're a Natural or not is whether you can make "mannish" styles look good. She said that whenever she wears something lacy, frilly or conventionally feminine, she looks like a drag queen (her words, LOL!); but in pants, a white shirt and a vest, she looks fantastic. And still feminine! <br /><br />My own personal test is: Does she look good in dropped waists? Or in tops that are untucked so that the "break" between the top half and the bottom half rests not at the waist but on the hips? (<i>I</i> don't! LOL! But then again, I'm a yin-ish Soft Classic.) <br /><br />The dress Sheila shares in her post is also a great Natural dress because it's so "shapeless." Or I guess I should say, "flowing." (One woman's shapeless is another woman's flowing!) As you can see, it belongs in the following family of "unconstructed" dresses and tops, except that it's a fun, bright Sheila color instead of one of the boring earthy shades ;-) -- https://www.pinterest.com/pin/504755070713759570/ <br /><br />On the other hand, the boarding school outfit had no flow to it at all. Fitted, tight sleeves? A straight line of buttons almost all the way down? Stiff fabric? If I were a Natural, I would have hated every minute of wearing it, too! <br /><br />Possibly related, since we're not sure what type you are yet: My mother is a Flamboyant Natural, which means she looks best when she pairs the loose flowy stuff with bold, dramatic accessories. Or when she wears something sort-of masculine (like jeans and a white button-down shirt) with a long, flowy cardigan. She also favors chunky bracelets and rings that draw the eye down to her hips. Another blogger I've found suggested that Flamboyant Naturals could get away with using bellydancing belts as everyday fashion, but that's one thing I haven't seen my mother try yet! <br /><br />Does any of this sound like it matches your personal style or what you've noticed looks good on you? Cristinahttp://linguavert.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-37498564829600258642017-04-26T06:17:23.614-04:002017-04-26T06:17:23.614-04:00Cristina, I am intrigued by this idea! Fortunately...Cristina, I am intrigued by this idea! Fortunately I seem to have a body type that looks good in v-neck tees and flowy skirts but I am always looking to learn more.The Sojournerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04559244806125834569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-18515997985115380992017-04-25T08:00:18.648-04:002017-04-25T08:00:18.648-04:00Is it okay for a non-tactile-defensive woman to co...Is it okay for a non-tactile-defensive woman to comment? I, too, of course, stay away from anything that is too uncomfortable. In my wardrobe, those would be skirts that ride up my waist too much when I sit down. They look great when I'm standing or walking around, though, so I save them for occasions when I'm willing to make the sacrifice. But in general, I can tolerate a lot more peas under my stack of mattresses than you and Sojourner seem to! <br /><br />I also feel a bit shallow now because I actually care a <i>lot</i> about how I look. A few years ago, I learned how to dress for my body type (Kibbe soft classic) and my coloring (deep autumn), and since then I've chosen my clothes accordingly. Even the ratty old shirts I sleep in are flattering in some way! <br /><br />Now, I promise I got the point you were making here (and that I read the whole post with enjoyment!), but I'm also a bit curious about what Kibbe type you may be. David Kibbe is a stylist who came up with my personal favorite "style system." The theory behind it is that everyone is a mix of "yang" (angular, strong, et al) and "yin" (rounded, delicate, et al) elements, and what you wear should reflect your personal mix. It's not a fixed science, of course, but I've found it helpful for understanding, for instance, why two very similar skirts can look very different when I put them on. <br /><br />Anyway, based on what you've written here and elsewhere, I think you're a Kibbe Natural. And now I wish I could share some cool Pinterest boards curated by Naturals, but women of this type don't seem to be as fussy about their looks as the others! ;-) At least one Google Image search was useful: https://www.google.com/search?q=David+Kibbe+Soft+Natural&client=firefox-b&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjN_9OGwb_TAhWGkJQKHTe2B0gQ_AUICCgB&biw=1122&bih=599#tbm=isch&q=Kibbe+style+Natural&imgrc=vfI3kfnB_OaORM:<br /><br />Just remember that Natural, Soft Natural, and Flamboyant Natural are three different types! (I felt a little precious typing that . . .) <br /><br />The dress in the picture looks really cute. I hope it goes on sale again soon! Cristinahttp://linguavert.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-74895909504253735612017-03-31T13:36:37.787-04:002017-03-31T13:36:37.787-04:00I hate backrubs when I'm overstimulated. Big ...I hate backrubs when I'm overstimulated. Big hugs are good though. I'm still looking for that magic, perfect thing that will undo an afternoon full of noise and touching -- like this one. I'm in yoga pants and a cotton shirt but my shoulders are still up around my ears because of how loud the kids are being and how many hours Jackie fought her nap. (About five hours, with brief in-arms dozes.) Sometimes pushups help a little. But what I really want to try is a pull-up bar. I'm convinced that hanging by my arms would make me feel a lot better. I'm not sure why, it just sounds like it would be great.Sheilahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10853868724554947854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-60115650100873555402017-03-29T18:49:13.952-04:002017-03-29T18:49:13.952-04:00J loves getting bear hugs or getting rolled up in ...J loves getting bear hugs or getting rolled up in a sleeping bag like sushi filling, but he hates tight clothes too. (Or any clothes, let's be real.) I suppose some people must like those, though, or there would be no market.The Sojournerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04559244806125834569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-58910635114132801512017-03-29T18:46:56.541-04:002017-03-29T18:46:56.541-04:00One thing I do like, counterintuitively, is to get...One thing I do like, counterintuitively, is to get backrubs when I am feeling overstimulated. Something about having the firm, even pressure in a non-ticklish part of my body helps counteract all the...static...of being overstimulated.<br /><br />(For me, being touched too much feels kind of like when you have a radio whose reception is cutting in and out. Just awful discordance.)The Sojournerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04559244806125834569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2464977109229359349.post-12685015219801012202017-03-29T18:40:29.069-04:002017-03-29T18:40:29.069-04:00I think you and I correspond in about 90% of our c...I think you and I correspond in about 90% of our clothing choices. Why is everything not 100% cotton?The Sojournerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04559244806125834569noreply@blogger.com